That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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