Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
