put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize