He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
