Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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