i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We are two peas in an std pod
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
