you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
