Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize