i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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