she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize