Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
