who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
