Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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