she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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