This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize