He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
