you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
