can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
