I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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