3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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