you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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