I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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