I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
