piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
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