3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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