Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm at about main and main street
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize