what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize