Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
