We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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