I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
