Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
thus making me awesome and them whores
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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