Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
