hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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