I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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