I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
how can u be prego again
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
