For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
