after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
