That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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