Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize