My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So vagazzling was a success
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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