He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Watching her eat just hurts me
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
