Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
