He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
