Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
...so i touched it.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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