Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize