Whats the glycemic index on semen?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
