can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
