Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize