I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
This is the high leading the old right now
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize