I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
